The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Randomize
