I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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