Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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