laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
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