i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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