Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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