I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Is it penis luge time yet?
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
