Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
