did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Randomize
