hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
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