i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Randomize
