Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Girls should come with a carfax report
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Randomize
