Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
it's like iHOP with fire
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
