why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
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