Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
