he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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