My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
there is puke in my bra ... again
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
