people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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