wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
