this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
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