U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
She even gives head with a lisp.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Randomize
