Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
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