Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Randomize
