this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
