so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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