I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
