watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Randomize
