I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
i want to swaddle you in tequila
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I said "one day" and that day is not today
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