this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
