I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
