Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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