sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
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