How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
This is the high leading the old right now
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
