just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Randomize
