He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I wish you could order shots online.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Randomize
