Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Randomize
