He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
