fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Randomize
