Do vagina's smell?
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize