i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
