i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
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