no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
