Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
