What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize
