Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
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