oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
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