Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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