The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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