She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I just gargled with NyQuil
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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