shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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